Wine with an "ex-mama" in Ginza

I talked with "ex-mama in Ginza" yesterday.

In Japan, a woman working as a leader-hostes at a fancy bar is called "mama."
They open the club late at night and
talk with middle aged men over alchhole.
They are pros of conversations or hosting.
Maybe Japanese club is different from English one.
In Japanese, the place where people dance is also called a "club,"
but the place where hostes and rich middle aged men enjoy talking over alchhole
is also called a "club."

A woman I met yesterday,
she used to be a "mama" at a club in Ginza.
Now she was retired and established an institute to teach
how to make women you love fall in love with you.

With her, a man who is her former studnet was there.
Though he is not tall or handsome, his behavior was sophisticated:
his way of pouring wine, escorting women, etc.
Not too sexy but just sophistecated.

He said he used to be a very shy person.
He couldn't even talk with women making an eye contact.
Now he is good at talking funny and also good at listening.
He got married recently.
His wife is pregnant.
He is going to be a father.

I vivdly remember how happy he looks.
I don't why but I was feeling like almost bursting into tears.
Looking at him making an anouncement of having a baby,
I wondered how my parents felt when I was born.
I wondered how happey they were..

May they have a healthy, beautiful child!

Behind her smile

My friend from South Africa has gone back from Japan to her home town.

Though I had a few conversations with her,
I loved her.
I was encouraged her smile.
I realized how much someone's smile heals people's mind.

After she left here,
I happened to know that she had some harsh and sad experiences that I can't even imagine.

Once she went to India.
I thought she went there for a volunteer or just have fun,
but it was not true.
Before she went there, her friends killed themselves.

I was just speechless.

She didn't show how she was feeling when she was with us.
She was just friendly and bright,
and she had a beautiful smile.

Some of my drawings

Acknowledgement

Finally, my graduation thesis was over.

It was a long and hard work, though I'm not sure my paper is good enough for a M.A. student.
Anyway, I did my best.

Looking back on my school life,

I think of so many people who have supported me.

Particularly, my friends and my supervisor...

The friendship with them will last forever..

Though there is a possibility that we keep in touch less and less

as time goes by..

Sometimes because my friends or I am too busy..

or sometimes because of geography..

But the only thing I can say is that I always remember them

when I feel down, when I feel like giving up on something.

I will look up the sky and wonder what they are doing,

whether they are fine..

Recalling the time when we struggle with linguistics together will always cheer me up in the future.

I had broiled meat with my friend for lunch.

And my supervisor.

I haven't told her this but one of the reason to decide to go to grad school is her.

I wanted to be like her.

She is so much interested in languages.

She loves her students.

She taught me so many things..

such as how to learn a language.

She was the first person to tell me that my English is poor,

and she told me how to learn a language: she told me to "read a loud an English book (I chose "Cheese Burgers" by Bob Green).

I went to her office once a month so that she checked whether I memorized it correctly,

whether I can pronounce correctly, whether I can speak English correctly..

Thanks to her, I had gone up 200 scores on TOEIC test.

To me, she was something like a mother.

She also taught me what is like to be an adult.

What is like to be a pro.

She always gives me a guide in life.

When you start to work, you have to gain two kinds of knowledge: things to know as an adult and things to know as a pro.

If you are told, it sound like nothing special,

but how many people actually take action?

Here is my two actions which I'm going to do.

1. What I would like to do to gain knowledge as an adult

・Read newspaper.

My knowledge about politics and economics is .. less than an junior high student.

I want to learn about politics and economics

and want to be a person who know what to see in this era, in this economic crisis.

2. What I would like to do to gain knowledge as an pro

・Be trained as a translator

I'm going to work as a translator from next April.

So I'm going to a school for a translator.

I've already decided which school I'm going to.

There, I can study not only translating but also speaking.

Well, anyway, my school life is coming to an end.

Though I'm released from reading papers and writing the thesis,

I'm definitely, definitely going to miss my supervisor..

A Thinking Reed

I build a new blog in Japanese.

It is called "A reed's mumble," quoted from Pascal.


"Man is no more than a reed,

the weakest in nature.

But he is a thinking reed."




Think

It's the gift human being are bestowed with.

I don't say other animals don't think,

but one big difference between human and other animal is

whether you can think logically, abstractly, rationally...



So think.


Just Think.

Insomnia

Lately I can't sleep at night.

Maybe it's because of my thesis.

Well definitely it is.

It makes me so stressful..

I've been studying linguistics, but I had really enough.

No interest anymore.

NO money anymore.

Being a student really sucks.

Though that's me who chose to go to grad school.


What a boring blog.


Anyway, what I want to say is..

I can't sleep.


I know I should open the file of dissertation

and keep on writing,


but I'll chose escapism watching Ally McBeal



because it's in the middle of the night.

or is it very early morning?


well, whatever!

I Dreamed a dream

"I Dreamed a dream"

This is the song sung in a musical called "Le Miserable."

Lately it is known to all over the world because of Susan Boyle.

I heard that she is called "Subo."

How adorable! :D

Anyway, she has been voluntarily helping a church,

and all of the sudden she became famous as a singer on the British TV program called "Britain's Got Talent."

Maybe I don't need to explain about her because I bet now everybody knows her.

In addition, my knowledge about her is only from Youtube and I don't want to write about her without knowing if it is true.

"I Dreamed a dream"

In Japanese, it is translated in "the dream is broken."

I like the phrase,

"I had a dream my life would be so different from this hell I'm living."

Listening to her singing that phrase,

I thought of her: how did she feel when, at the interview, nobody believed a woman in their forties like her could sing ?

Still, she smiles and says, "It's just one side of me."

How big and open mind she has,

How kind she is,

How strong she is,

I thought watching her on Britain got talent.

Maybe there are a lot of people like her all over the world.

people living in the country side, doing chore, without their talent being discovered .

They don't appear in front of people just because they don't have a chance.

Singing "I had a dream my life would be so different from this hell I'm living," inside, she still believed to become a singer.

Not only her voice, but her strength, her warmth of heart touch people all over the world.

Her dream has never been "broken."

She visited Japan and sang "I dreamed to dream" on New Year's eve.

Her singing was soft and king and strong as if it reflects her mind

I cannot help but shed my tears.